Home Forums Hard Hitting Questions Is there a difference between being a "real" man and being a "good" man?

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    • Sacred Guardian
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      Post count: 19

      I suppose this one depends on how you define those terms.
      It seems that Society defines being a “real” man as being strong to the point of rigidity, autonomous like a robot, and impervious to any sort of emotional reality. But, these are fabricated qualities that we, as men, seem to cling to desperately for some reason. They have nothing to do with being human, let alone being a “man.” Now I’ll ask, what we see as the qualities of being a “good” man? Honesty, having integrity, morality, fighting for justice? Why does it seem like society forces us to be real men at the expense of being good men?
      For example, let’s look at a couple of amazing men, outstanding in their fields, but wholly different. The first, Marion Robert Morrison, you probably know him better by his stage name, John Wayne. Some would argue that he is the epitome of a “real” man, right? Applied to the Naval Academy, but didn’t get in, in fact he never served in the military, by the time Pearl Harbor came around he was too old. So there’s that.
      And then there’s Robert Norman Ross, or Bob Ross, you know, the painter and PBS star? He’s arguably one of the sweetest, kindest, most gentle souls on the planet, right? And yet, he was a tough and mean Master Sargent during his 20 year career in the Air Force.
      So who more fulfills society’s roles as the “real” man vs. the “good” man?

      To me, I think that the thought that these labels needing to be mutually exclusive is ridiculous. I am just as much the rock in my wife’s life, as she is in mine. I count myself extremely lucky to have men I can talk to, confide in, and breakdown with in my life. The bottom line is, that we can be strong yet flexible and be good and inclusive partners in our relationships. And certainly there is no reason to try and ignore the fact that the world effects us all and that we will, even as “men” have feelings about that. And that’s ok. Be good men, better yet, be REAL good men, and the world will be better off for it.

      Namasté my Brothers,

      ~ Bear

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